I waited. I had gotten used to waiting, over the years. It still didn’t come naturally, but I forced it.
Kristy and Naira looked at each other, as if deciding who should speak first. Finally, Naira threw herself on the unexploded conversation. "We need to talk to you about something," she finally said.
"If it has anything to do with our former job"--ha, “if.” Even if I'd wanted to keep the sarcasm from coloring my words, I couldn't have--"then you can count me the hell out. I told you already, Naira, that job nearly killed me in more ways than one."
"Sure, you told her," Kristy muttered darkly.
"Now what the hell does that mean?" I snapped. I could feel my blood pressure start to rise.
Apparently not as fast or as high as Kristy's, though. "You abandoned us!" she shouted, and half the bar turned to look at her. She suddenly looked embarrassed, and I sighed. The last thing I needed was to get 86'd.
"We can't have this conversation here," I said. "Too many ears, too many secrets."
"Where, then?"
I sighed again. "In for a penny, I guess. Come on."
------
In the grand scheme, my place is kind of small, but by San Francisco standards it's impressive. Two bedrooms, separate kitchen, living room. I led them into the second bedroom, which I’d converted into a den/study, and slipped out to round up drinks. A host is a host, after all.
I came back to find both of them staring slack-jawed at the frames on my wall. One in particular, of course, and I couldn't help but smile.
Finally Kristy turned to me. "That's your name?"
"Either that or I lied to my schools," I said with a smirk. I gave them the two glasses of wine in my right hand and gestured for them to sit. I took a sip of my own drink as they did so.
"But--it's--"
"Ordinary," I shrugged. "Why do you think I started using a pseudonym, way back when? Long before Terra Group, I mean. But we're not here to talk about that."
“That wasn’t what I--you’re right,” Kristy said, “we aren’t.”
“What do you want to do first? Why you want me to come back, or why I won’t?”
“How about ‘why I shouldn’t kick your ass for what you did to us?’” Kristy said, deceptively mildly.
“Give me a break,” I said, shaking my head. “You were doing fine without me. You didn’t need me.”
“And how would you know that?” Kristy asked.
I shrugged. “You haven’t made the evening news.”
“That’s your only evidence?”
“You know I got out of the game, what are--oh.” I rolled my eyes. “You think I still have a hand in?”
“You are closer to SACUL HQ than any of us,” she pointed out.
“SACUL doesn’t know I’m here either,” I said. “My personnel files were wiped years ago.”
“What?” Naira asked.
I shook my head again. “It’s a long story and beside the point, which is, I wasn’t as irreplaceable as you thought. I’m still not. You’ve been in charge of it longer than I have at this point.”
They shared a look.
The penny dropped.
I blinked, put my drink down, picked it up again, put it back down. “But...you haven’t, have you,” I said.
I stood up, suddenly feeling awkward in my own home. I wanted to pace, but I couldn’t. I wanted to run, but I couldn’t. “Um.”
I wanted to not hear what I knew Kristy was about to say.
But I couldn’t.
“The Group was shut down within two years of your disappearance,” she said, in a dark monotone. “General Cracken retired, and the new head of Intelligence...” She shook her head.
“I should kick your ass twice, you know, once for what you did to the team, and once for what you did to me personally. You knew I didn’t want command. It’s a whole different skill set from being XO. Suddenly, instead of dealing with subordinates, which is something I’m good at--I knew our team, they knew and trusted me--I was dealing with people who didn’t know me, and who didn’t know Terra. You were a known quantity to NRI. I wasn’t.
“And I couldn’t quit. I considered it...getting Josh promoted above me, making him CO and making me the XO again. But we’d just lost our first commander, and everybody was looking at me like I was their lifeline. I couldn’t walk away from that.”
The unspoken “and you could, you selfish bastard” hung in the air between us. I drained my drink in a gulp. She noticed and didn’t comment. Neither did Naira, who I realized hadn’t spoken since Kristy had started. Well, Kristy was right. I’d settled things with Naira. But this...
“Instead of someone familiar with the power structure, known to the key players, and used to the political games, Intelligence saw a headless mess. And they killed it. Maybe if we’d had someone who knew NRI better, who knew how to play the game, we would still be here.”
“Maybe,” I said, more to myself than her, “maybe not.” It sounded weak even to me.
Kristy nodded shortly, reluctantly. “Maybe not,” she admitted. “But whatever the reason, we were disbanded. All the galtech is stashed out of reach on the moonbase. NRI and SACUL choked off almost all travel from offworld. Makes the TSA look like Swiss cheese--well, even more like Swiss cheese. We all scattered. Some of us are still in Mendellia, some went offworld for good, some went back to their home countries. Terra Group is dead.
“Not to mention, even before that, you left us,” she continued, and the words couldn’t have been more painful if I’d been physically stabbed. “We were your friends, and you walked out. We could have helped you. Naira told us--some of us, anyway--what you told her. And you’re right. You were an idiot. Still are, if you really think you didn’t hurt more than just her. What was that you said, ‘pieces break off cleanly’? Sure, maybe, over time, people sometimes drift apart, and that’s life, fine. But you decided to skip the ‘over time’ part and rip the piece out, and you left a lot of jagged edges. "
I collapsed back into my chair. This was...not what I’d expected.
To say the least.
Kristy saw it, and proved herself a far better person than I ever could be. She stopped twisting the knife.
She waited, and then, “We looked for you for months.”
“I told you not to do that,” I said, barely hearing myself.
“You should have known we wouldn’t listen.”
I didn’t say anything for a while. Finally, I sighed deeply.
“I’m so sorry, Kristy,” I said. “I thought...”
“You were an idiot,” Naira said gently.
“I was an idiot.”
“That’s not the end of the world,” she continued. “But it’s time to stop.”
“I can’t just take my old job back,” I said. “I can’t be that Sci anymore. I won’t.”
“You don’t have to be,” Kristy said. “We’re not NRI. We make the rules now. And you’re more than just the persona you projected”--she gestured around the room--”so maybe it’s time for us to meet you.”
I stood up. “I don’t know if I can do this.”
“At the very least,” Kristy said, “come back with us and see everybody. Time to stop running.”
“We should also explain why I decided to open the letter,” Naira put in.
“She’s right.”
I took a deep breath. “All right. I can do that at least, and decide from there.”
------
It was a foregone conclusion, of course.
They told me the story, and I started packing. I demurred answering any questions about this “Grace”--what is it with me and that name? It’s like it’s following me--and her force-cloak...or my force-cloak...or whatever it was, at least for the present. I wanted to go right to the source.
About the Force.
Sorry.
But that’s how I ended up back in Mendellia.
“They’re back,” Naira said. I looked up from my laptop.
“Good,” I said, “I’ve finished this.” I clicked “Send,” and closed the computer.
“What was that, anyway?”
“Work. Just because I’ve decided to go back to my old life for a little while doesn’t mean my real life gets put on hold. Especially because judges don’t look kindly to weird delays, and I can't exactly explain where I am.”
As we started to walk, she looked at me oddly. “What?” I finally asked.
“Your ‘old life,’ and your ‘real life.’”
I shrugged. “If I said that was unconscious, it would only prove the point, wouldn’t it.”
“I just--I keep expecting you to slip into who you were.”
“As your lawyer, I advise you to stop. It’s not going to happen.” I hope.
We walked toward the restored Batcave as the ships slowly landed. I let Naira go on ahead and hung back in the doorway as Josh and his “strike team” disembarked and started unloading.
It was Josh who eventually noticed me. I could see him stiffen, looking at me, and the others turned and quickly followed suit.
I detached myself from the doorframe and walked into the light, surveying the faces. Some of them looked surprised, a couple were bewildered, one or two looked happy. Josh looked...confused, angry, but mostly hurt. I didn’t blame him, after everything Kristy had told me.
I stopped a few meters away from everybody and nodded. “Hi. I’m Will Frank.
“It’s nice to meet you all.”