TG: Spoof
Neologizationorisitivity
By Durandir and Sylvana
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Thayer stood alone in the thronehall at an untawgly hour.

"Podium, Podium, in the Grand Hall! Who's the best Extemporaneous Ranter of 
them all?"

In came the inimitable medic, and thus... and all... broke loose.

"Milord Homunculus.  Doest thou REALLY need to be asking such things of an 
inanimate object?"

"Ha!" said the monarch. "By Grace, just the person I had hoped to see! 
What, away from the trees at last, Sylvana? I was beginning to think I 
should stand here till the stars fell and yet find no sign of thee. Tell 
me, Dr. Lorrdain, if nothing prevents thee, what has become of the Ewoks in 
the West Tower?"

"Stand away, Milord - for the stars shall lie in their courses throughout 
eternity, and yet thou wouldst stand?  I doubt that.  As for Ewoks in the 
West tower, they have managed to aquire for themselves polearms while 
wearing cloth in neon greens and oranges from thy seamstress lounge.  Just 
how that has happened, thou wouldst have to ask of an Australian - however 
at this point in time, I am wondering if the trees provide better company 
than thyself in such a manner as to which thou art speaking!"

"To the trees again, then, Sylvana! Perhaps even there we shall find the 
answers we seek: for it cannot be that thou hast overlooked the garlands of 
greens and oranges they bear tonight in their branches, nor the forests 
that have sprung up all about the forests that were. Indeed, the Ewoks have 
made mine orchards mine armoury, and all the gardens bristle with their 
spearpoints! Was ever such a thing seen or heard in all Mendellia before 
this night? I tell thee, nor shall it ever be heard again, for thou must 
see an end of it ere the sun's rays touch this forest-about-the-forest!"

"And just what doest thou suggest, Milord, that I do about this thing?   It 
is thyself whom they come for, as thou art the ruler in this place.  The 
lethal forests about thy sprawling and most opulant home are a testimony to 
thy great words and even greater deeds.  They come not for thy hide, but 
they come to protect thee from the great Un-thing that does wander hither 
and yon on thy most hidden and protected island kingdom.  What it comes 
for, even I cannot tell thee - but this one thing I can say.  Speaking 
jabberwocky shall neither help nor hinder this loathesome beast.  Thou art, 
Milord, in a zugzwang - and the Ewoks have taken upon pounding on an 
zzxjanw in an attempt to thwart this meandering Un-thing."

The young King, taken aback at this profound and wholly unguessed-at 
revelation, stood staring at the medic blankly, at a sudden and most 
uncharacteristic loss for words.

Several heartbeats passed before Sylvana broke out into a grin and laughed, 
"Milord!  Have I outspoken the speaker at long last?  I knew one day, if I 
should plan and plot enough, I could actually do it, but now I see that I 
have taken all speech from thy tongue!"

"I am in wonderment," Thayer replied with a courteous bow, "at this 
curiosity of a--what was it?--Un-thing. Such a thing has seldom been heard 
of in all the fair land of Mendellia, indeed, not since the days of King 
Gnawzguz Atner, who slew a remarkable twenty-three such behemoths before he 
himself was, sadly, overwhelmed by the smell of them and expired. But since 
his heroic death, their kind has not been seen in our country. Whence comes 
this thing now, at this most inconvenient time?"

"Milord! Thou doest not listen to mine tongue!  The words that have spilled 
forth from my mouth, as a cataract of verbosity, are entirely perfidious!"  
Sylvana winked at him and grabbed his arm, dragging him from the room.  
"Come Milord - you're wanted at the banqueting table."

Thayer just blinked, "But... the ewoks!"